Dancing while under the apocalypse #4

It's fucking snowing.
Yesterday it was a sunny spring day.
Today it's blowy as stink and snowing.

Snow won't stick though, it's too warm for that too wet, but still. The flowers be like WTF dude we were just getting our glow on.

It's also Sunday. Not that this makes much a difference, well here it does because everything is closed, we don't do Sunday shopping and I am A-OK with this.

Today will be the sit on the couch and sew stuff day. Watch tv, skype with my posse.

I'm struggling today, I have a few health issues that tend to get worse when I'm stressed, triggered by eating the wrong things and made worse because I'm not really sleeping all that well. My lizard brain starts going to the what if you have ( fill in deadly disease here) and you are going to die because we are in the middle of a fucking pandemic and nothing works any more. Except in Germany mostly things are ok. Germans are pretty good at the stay the fuck away from people thing ( mostly) and my health issues have been with me a long time and it's primarily damage done by the endometriosis and will never heal and will never get better but can be managed. Still like most things I'm a fuck up at following a routine that works for me, that keeps me fairly pain free and I rather like the occasional milk product or bread product even if my body goes "Just don't".


So today's plan is to be lazy a bit, take a time out from the usual neurotic wreck I am inside, don't show it as much as I feel it. Try to combat it with making art, sharing good things and being as kind as I can. I don't know what else to do, I hope my friends and my family will be okay, I am sad for the news of other people who are not, mourn the dead, the death of normal, the world we live in. I hope that out of this comes better things, I hope that most people see how connected we all are and how much better things are when we work together, when we are kinder and more loving but what I see is people taking advantage of a terrible situation to make themselves rich, to climb to the top of the decaying heap, to maintain a tight grip on the power they think they have. The bad outweighs the good.  Greed is winning over everything else.

So I hope desperately that when things ease up it will be for the better. In the mean time I will try not to lose hope.

Wash your hands, wear a mask if you can, and be kind.