Dancing while under the apocalypse #3

Safe at home exile day 13

Yesterday I did my first Joe Wicks work out jeeze I am a middle aged out of shape something something. In my head I'm still 25 yeah not so much in reality. today my muscles are letting me know I should probably do this way more often.  I hope it will help ease out the knots in my back causing the headaches. I sit too much. Here's the link if you're interested. The Body Coach you tube 

Had my first major panic attack last night at around 1am. Woke up heart pounding in my ears vaguely terrified. Since these are not unknown to me I rode it out with the usual coping methods. There was no specific trigger but I was tired and edgy yesterday due to 3 hours of bad sleep the night before. I took CBD oil (3 drops 5mg) and I suspect that lowered my already fairly low BP just enough to spin me up. 

The weird thing about normal within the no longer normal is it's hard to reconcile. My life in "lockdown" is pretty much my life when things are normal. I'm at home A LOT. The only difference right now is Marcus is home too. But I feel the anxiety and fear of the world, it's a tsunami of emotion and I find myself crying at the drop of a hat a lot. There's a lot of helplessness in that mix.

I watched a video which talked about how masks actually help especially if everyone wears them so after I'm done making the officer hats I have on the table I will try my hand at masks.
It's Saturday today, I have to remind myself of this because days are starting to blend one into the other.... It's partly why I began to keep this blog again, I don't want to forget this moment in time.

I'm working on art stuff and some secret art stuff, making hats, some half assed house work and playing a ridiculous amount of Subnautica which is a pretty excellent game, once I realised you could play it without the food and water aspect the anxiety was greatly reduced. 

Tomorrow it is forecast to snow...it's nearly April.

crazy weather but really can't complain as the whole week has been beautiful and sunny albeit a tad chilly. We are all struggling, some way more than other, remember to breathe and try to be kind to each other out there.