Monday, 27 August 2007

escapism

or how I waste my life in front of the computer.

well the summer at least.

Getting to an event is like going to a foreign land very far far away and actually having a holiday. Always after coming back from even a weekend event we feel as though we have been gone for weeks not just days. I suppose it has something to do with the fcat that we see people we consider to be great friends even though in real life I don't even know their mundane names or whatthey do for a living, and talk with them as though we are soul mates. It is an astonishing thing about the SCA and I suppose most other fringe clubs where people meet once every now and then and do stuff the rest of the world considers odd.

People reading my various blogs know that as of late I have been incredibly down as far as the SCA is concerned. rotten politics, hornet's nests etc... this is especially true if this aspect is really the only aspect one sees, which it is for us since we are sort of in the exil in the bfn of switzerland.

But I heard someone say somthing this weekend that was a wake up of sotrs I guess. When I bitched aboutthe current state of affairs in Drachenwald she said 'well it coudl be worse, it coudl be Ruantallan' and I stopped and went...oh you heard.

It seems there isn't a place in the known world that hasn't and it also seems that the now the bench mark for rotten politics and BS is Runatallan. This is especially sad for me as that was my home for a long time. Many of the people who were and are involved on BOTH sides of the current disputes and feuds are my sca family and my friends. It breaks my heart to read about it, especially 1st hand as I am on the baronial mailing list and I read my friends' blogs.

But the sadest part of it was that the statement was true, Drachenwald could be as bad as that but it isn't, at least not yet.

Yes there are an enclave of the power hungry who don't want to let go of the place of importance they feel they have to the younger generation ( dude it's gotta happen and it's gonna happen with or without bloodshed...preferably without...)
Yes we have not been doing stuff by the book, so lets change the book instead of griping and moaning, ( already happening)

After a seriously LONG discussion about what the issues are and how can we maybe change things ofr the better with some fellow peers, I realised as I sat on the cool floor of the tent that I am every bit as part of the problem as I am the solution if all I do is gripe and bitch and threaten to bugger off for greener pastures without also trying to change things in a positive way from the inside out.

The problem is this, I like the SCA and most of the people, even some of the people that most other peopl don't like. I can separate action from person, most of the time.
I do not hate anyone.
But I do get extremely pissed off with people.

Our kingdom is in flux, everyone with an ear to the ground knows and senses this. It is a generational thing, the older long established been in power folks are slowly beeing eeeked out by the up and coming new generation of people.

I have seen this so many times now, and having been on both sides of the power fence I can say this, better to let go gracefully than to hold on kicking and screaming, eventually the new folks ae not new anymore and they want to contribute and try out the office thing, or the organizational thing and they don't want to hearthe 'well when I was in the SCA , or when I first started, or in my kingdom...'

It's like a family, and eventually the kids grow up move out get jobs and take over.

I like flux, it is interesting but the problem is when some people can't let go or have far too many fingers in far too many pies growth gets stagnated and things fall apart. I think it is fear of change but what so many people do not seem to get is that without change, there is no growth and without growth there is only stagnation and eventually death.

My advice it to let go gracefully and be around to give advice and hugs when things go awry , as they will, and applaud when things go right which they also will.

For my part I will try to stop being such a gripe. I mean things can change for the better, look at how scribes are now treated.... that's a big change.

This event past was nice and inspite of myself I enjoyed it. I make no apologies for being a grumpy bitch when I first arrive on site, especially after a 6+ hour drivem a migraine and following shitty directions which get us lost to being told oops camp site is full ( turns out they had space for us which was a good thing).

I saw people I love and care about, peopel I think of as family. I got to talk to people I don'tget to spend much time with and start to see them in a different light, some good some bad but mostly good.

And I decided that despite is short comings and current rough patch, I still like the SCA. I still have a place in it and can maybe still make a difference.

1 comment:

tales from the dark side...