So after the nerves of sitting in the Doctor's office waiting for the results to learning that everything is normal ( well mostly) I have had time to digest what is what.
Now that I know I am not going utterly mad, that all the strangeness I have been experiencing for the last 4-5 years has actually been perimenopause and now the real weirdness comes from being actually in menopause I can sort of live with the symptoms that come and go. I must admit knowing is better than guessing.
I know now that the bizaar heartskipping wow beat effect thing is the precursor to a hot flash and it generally happens after I have eaten. This makes going out to eat interesting. Yesterday, after my Fulvio session, my wonderful husband took me out to lunch. The pizzeria was busy and hot and we took a seat right beside the pizza making part ( cool to watch). When the waiter turned on the A/C which was RIGHT above my head I was a bit annoyed but it turned out to be a blessing. Nothing like icey cool air to cool you down when your body feels as though you just walked into a furnace!
I told Marcus that I thought I was in peri about 5 years ago and he was like - no way you are too young- HAH! I love it when I am right. And as for too young... it runs in my family on my mother's side. I had grey hair at 13, so menopause at 41 is not so weird. I loo at it this way, if I live the way my mom and my gran did it will be a nice long life without me having to support the feminine hygene products companies!
yesterday was a GOOD day, the first seriously good day in ages. I woke up for the first time without the poundy heart and gurgly guts. I had a session with my massage therapist, Fulvio, and that was just AMAZING. Lots of energy and he cleared up some blocks. He is PURE magic.
Then I walked back to meet Marcus, we had lunch , I came home and got a lot of work done.Then got an invitation to go to lunch today with another couple we have been trying to hook up for awhile now. So today we go to Sondrio in Italy with Maicol and Anna. It should be a lot of fun.
Now I feel as though I have my life back. I have begun writing book three of my nutty star wars fan fic and sorted out the websites with new images.Now the issues is too many projects at once and not enough time in the day! Once Coronation is over hopefully I have some peace to get on with my book, the writing is possessing my brain!
The SCA is making me crazy at the moment. Too many people looking out for number 1 and the mood in the air is not good. I have no patience for the bullying and the bullshit, power mongering and the need to be supremely important. I plan on stepping back in to my own world, do what I do and ignore the rest of the crap. Hang out with the household , drink a few beers and relax. Maybe this selfish, nasty back biting, to the top climbing stupid phase will pass, I sure hope so. People do seem to forget that this is a HOBBY.
So I look at it all this way, now I am in part three of my life and to be honest it will be cool!
Tomorrow I find out if maybe I will get a freelance job as an artist... wall mural painting among other things...which could also be fun. For the first time in forever it occurred to me I don't actually have a portfolio... might be worth getting on together , I guess. Busy busy!
until then be excellent to each other.